Tsunamis, Perseverance, Wisdom and Love

Two days ago an 8.9 Earthquake smashed off the coast of Japan causing a tsunami to wreack havoc on the coastal areas of Japan. Fortunately, they have some of the most solid construction in this area, and more than 1000 are dead. This could be MUCH worse, but that is still 1000 people who no longer have any chance to follow God. Though it is possible that everyone of them was a solid disciple and currently with God in heaven, for some reason I have little faith of that. It scares me. It challenges me. It inspires me. Life truly is delicate. At any point now I could be picked off by Satan, and die, and fail, and never be with God. But what am I doing to prevent that? What am I doing to not let that happen to myself, my friends, and my family? Truth is, not a whole lot. The end times are near (matt 24) and yet all day yesterday I was selfish with my time and just stayed home on my butt, paying no attention to the battle. I failed. Because even if I didn't watch porn or fight with my family, I didn't do the good I knew I should've. For that, I am sorry Lord. I've been so self-centered and focused on the future and how great its going to be to start dating that I forgot about the present, and the bible studies I need to have and the things I need to do in order to take as many people with me to heaven.
And as a result of the laziness of me and the lack of love from me and whoever, one of my dear brothers has left in seemingly the most woosy possible way--with a text:

"Daniel I love you. I courteously resign from the Christian religion. I don't believe my family is going to hell because they aren't baptized the right way. I don't believe in Satan. I don't have my sexuality anymore but I am still staying away from sexual immorality. I still believe in truth. Please don't pray for me. Also, no offense, but I don't want to 'talk about it' with you or anyone. Please don't feel sad about it."

This is not something I will dwell on. this is not something I will have a worldly sorrow about. THis is a disgusting display of what Satan can do to the most holy of men. This is how bliinded he can make us, even to the point that we deny his very existence. I love Jon Rattan and I will always love Jon Rattan, but Satan has a hold on him right now, and if I could save him I would, but I don't think I can and I don't think he wants to be saved, and therefore I will do my best to not let this happen again. I pray that I can be a great discipler, really getting in there with the men I've been entrusted to. And I pray that I myself will NEVER be blinded by Satan's deceit. Lord I'm sorry for even thinking about the possibility of leaving you.

For the message of the cross is foolisheness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. For it is written: "I will destroy the wisdom of the wise; the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate."
...For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength...
1 Corinthians 1:18, 25

Thank you so much for the cross Lord. It is amazing and my wisdom and man's wisdom will never be able to come even near the wisdom you can and do present.

But through all the murck, all the terrible things that are happening in SD and the world. THere are some amazing things. Gordie Nash is slowly becoming a disciple. I love this man and I'm so proud of his progress. Though he has a huge challenge with the fact that his mom had a terrible experience with the church, I pray that he will not let that mess him up and understand rather that you are much bigger than his mom, and what you say must go! In addition, there is an amazing sister in Orange County and it looks like in the next few weeks I'm going to start dating her! I really don't deserve her to be my "exclusive" sister and GOOD friend (at this point) but I am so grateful for the miracles God performs such as this. I love her like crazy and I'm so stoked for the second! (Habakkuk 3:18-20)