Drugs :(

Due to recent events of my snooping around my brother's facebook, it has come to my attention that my brother has been caught up in the despicable act of smoking weed. I know sin is sin and I am a sinner and so is he but smoking is a sin that is damaging on so many levels, that its painful to me to know that there's even a chance that he can suffer so bad. I love my brother so much that tonight I'm going to confront him on this topic, by asking many questions and with a deep devotion to love, so that I can help him get over this obstacle.

I read a lot of distressing things, but here are a few quotes I wrote down:

Ima go smoke while I do math HW
Gabe MacNight

I'm being nice by giving you my weed for free
Carsten Lester

Call me if you want to come to Clairemont cuz I might be able to use the bong
Gabe MacNight

I also read messages in which Carsten asked Elliott for a pipe...

This hurts, it almost brings me to tears, but I think it clarifies why my bro has been so negative lately. I want to say something along these lines:

First of all, I want you to know I love you. I love you a lot. I'm sorry for all the times I've hurt you and I hope I don't hurt you right now, but if I do, its because I love you.

So bro, I brought you up here for a reason, I've noticed lately that I've felt like you've been disrespectful to me, and mom and dad, and I know when i was your age I was caught up in some heavy sin. I used to masturbate every day and look at pornography. And whenever I did that, I had a very bad, negative attitude, I started getting overly defensive, and aggressive towards you, my parents, and my friends. So I want to apologize for the times I was so caught up in those deep sins in the past, and I want to ask you about your life, have you been caught up in sin?

If he doesnt get specific, I'll start asking him, have you been masturbating? watching P? what about smoking weed? (make sure you get eye contact) so you have been smoking weed...how much? why? what do you think that will lead to?
When did you start?
Do you plan to continue? Why? Spell out the consequences:
Weed destroys relationships: its damaging to your relationship with me, mom, dad, true friends, yourself, and most importantly God.
Weed is a gateway drug, and so though maybe right now you don't feel like its impairing you, it gradually gets worse. The first hit is always the strongest, and then it starts to lose its flair because your body gets used to it. Then you have to go on to the next drug and its a domino effect until finally it kills you due to overdose or become so consumed in drugs that you don't take care of basic needs

If he wants help overcoming it, challenge him to 1. ask mom and dad for help, 2. attend a CR meeting or talk to Nacho tonight

THANKS 4 GIVING 2 ME

GOD, Lord, Father, Protector, Provider, Perfector
THANK YOU
My life is yours, my soul is yours, my everything is yours and I am so grateful for that. Please Lord, let me further understand what you do for me on a daily basis. I ask for you guidance in my life and the general ability to to see your greatness within my life. Lord thanks for all you've done and are doing and I pray that I would never stop growing in my gratitude for your amazingness. WOrds cannot come close to expressing how wonderful and faithful you are. Please Lord help me to live a life of extreme expression of gratitude and give me the strength to live in such a manner as to help other people feel a gratitude for your greatness as well. Please please please be with my family, who has lately seemed to be a mess. God I ask that you guide my grandfather. He's so unfaithful to your promises and doesn't believe or worry about life after death, and that scares me. I pray that you humble him out before he dies and really help him to see the truth of you. Lord I'm soo sooo sooooooo grateful for my little brother carsten. He's such an awesome kid and it was so painful to read that junk that was on his facebook last night. I really beg and ask you to just help him to be way more humble. I ask for your help in being a great brother to him. Please help him to give up weed for the rest of his life, not because me or my parents force him to, but because we show him so much love and reveal the truth of what it can do as a gateway drug to people. I pray you'd fill me with wisdom and understanding in striving to figure out the truth of what he's doing and really helping him. Not being against him but right by his side, fighting off the temptations and challenges Satan uses to mislead us. Please help him to see the deceit of what he's getting pulled into, and help him to fight the great fight, rising up as a powerful leader changing the lives of thousands of people in his lifetime. Lord I want to pray for my lovely little Lisa. Thanks for her greatness and her encouragement in my life. I would not be the man I am today without her. I ask that you guide her and confide within her right now as shes going through very challenging things with her family and discipling partner. Please please please help her parents to get along and actually talk and have a pure relationship. I pray that other peoples issues wouldnt stress her out but that they would cause her to turn even more tightly to you and rely on you for the love and growth to really be the best she can be. I ask that you'd really wake Buzz up, and give him the power to be humble and be righteous and step out on faith to give himself to you and not alcohol or sin the way he has in the past. I ask that you really soften DJ's heart and help her to be way more approachable for Lisa. I pray that they can develop a super great relationship a friendship that is iron sharpening iron, and that they really do their best to stay devoted to you every day. And for me Lord I pray that you'd give me the strength to be a radiant leader, a powerful man devoted to you above anything else in my life, help me to be a man after your own heart and a fighter for the truth. Please give me life and guide me to be a master of the life you want us to live. I ask for your continued patience and faith and love in my life. Please give me an uncompromisable dose of love and joy. I pray people like Morgan can see my joy and see my love and really strive to come way closer to you. I want to pray for the entire 92109 zip code--PB is such an awesome place and I'm grateful for all the relationships there. I ask that you really help our group to be completely focused on you, not ourselves, or feeling good, but just focused on you, your greatness, your faith in us. I love the way you give us grace and I ask that you really guide us to the right houses/apartments. Help us to speak with faith and please help us to know how to act and how to live. Lord I love you so much, thanks for being the awesome and perfect father that you are. I'm thankful for so much, here's a start:


Thank you for life and thank you for death.
Thank you for growth and thank you for clarity
Thank you for beauty, and thank you for disgusting stuff
Thank you for good smells and for the bad ones
Thank you for love and thank you for joy
Thank you for peace and prosperity
Thank you for health, for faith, and for healing me
Thank you for my family
Thank you for my job
Thank you for my friends
Thank you for my brother
Thank you for my family
Thank you for my girlfriend
Thank you for my house
Thank you for my roommates
Thank you for my classmates
Thank you for my professors
Thank you for my food
Thank you for technology and the ability to type this up
Thank you for freedom
THank you for parents who care about me and the ability for me to be a father to the fatherless.
Thank you Lord, for life to the FULL
For grace that is unfading
Thank you for the truth
Thank you for my indignance towards evil
THank you for PURITY
Thank you for not forcing me to always try to impress my roommates, family, or brothers/sisters in the kingdom with superficiality.
Thank you for beauty
Thank you for colors
Thank you for GRACE
Thank you for guidance

SPEAK

Acts 18:9-11 (NIV)
One night the Lord spoke to Paul in a vision: "Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent. [10] For I am with you, and no one is going to attack and harm you, because I have many people in this city." [11] So Paul stayed for a year and a half, teaching them the word of God.

This weekend was definitely one for the record books. We had an awesome staycation in SD for the SPEAK retreat at the Town and Country hotel. LA and SD came togethor and glorified God with epic fellowship, inspirational lessons, and deep Discipling times. I have been super convicted by the lessons from Ron Hammer, Jake Rock, and Steve Lounsberry. I realized that I need to be WAY more surrendered and WAY more open with my entire life, especially the little sins. I had SUCH an amazing time with my lovely girlfriend Lisa Hinton. She's so beautiful, gracious, and strong. I got to give her a big hug and tell her I missed her the moment I saw her, and we got to sit next to each other during the first lesson which was Ron Hammer preaching the word HARD about how society is so delicate that they whine when challenged by the truth. He claimed that we MUST judge people, just not hypoctritically. Also, society is more concerned with freedom than truth. He ended it stating that silence is acceptance of an eternal destiny. Don't worry about what the world judges because you might just save their soul regardless of how they feel in the moment...THEN we split up men and women...We got an AMAZING class on purity and Jake ROck got SUPER open about his life and talked about how essential it is for us to be desperate to change, we have to desire to get WELL. We broke up into Discipling Groups and i was with Patrick, Lee, Christian, and Jeffrey (from OC). It was an awesome time of openness, I'm so grateful for all those guys. THEN, we got to go to PB so I met up with Lisa, Wes, and Kate and we went to Cafe 976. Stuart made an announcment about Mission PB but it was just the four of us plus Wouter...but it was cool because we hit a bunch of blocks on Law Street. Afterwards, I dropped Lisa off at the hotel and Wes and I went to get his luggage and we ended up chillen at the house until the game. THere was a BUNCH of people at my house it was kinda crazy...I made Lisa a quick candy card and ran to her the moment I saw her and handed it to her :). I got to sit next to her for most of the riveting game (we ended up losing 27-30 after missing TWO simple field goals...) But afterwards we all went to Denny's (2 denny's after the first one was WAY too small...)and I got to share a $2 meal with my amazing girlfriend. It was a crazy night of weirdness but LOTS of joy and laughter! After chillen with the boys a little later I got to bed around 2 and woke up at 8. Had a good prayer time with God and then got to go to church and sat next to Lisa again :) after Ron preached another POWERFUL lesson about
1. Let your light shine! (speak up and people will listen..pray for WORKERS, not open hearts)
2. Putting an exclamation on your life (3 purple exclamation invitation)
3. Draw the line in the sand (stand up to the tanks)
Ron's a man of extraordinary talent and life stories, make your own!

after church I got to watch my girlfriend baptize ELMA!! SOOOO cool!!! OC girls had TWO baptisms today :) Elma and Brittany
After that I got to go to chipotle and have some more fun with Lisa and some of the OC peeps and it was soo cool. She gave me a big hug and then we went our separate ways.
I think I'm definitely a step closer to falling in love, this weekend was epic, I just got to spend a lot of time with her. SO grateful thanks so much God for putting her in my life, please give me the strength, wisdom, and courage to lead to heaven in whatever capacity you want. AMEN!

Communication-Godliness-Mist

Last week was one of the worst weeks of my Christian life of 2.5 years. My communication was off with Lisa, God, and most of the people who help me (disciplers) due to my disgusting pride. I didnt want to talk about it, i wanted to hide it, and I ended up jumping to conclusions in the worse possible way. But then Saturday came. At 1 PM Joshua Greenfield was BAPTIZED. We had car trouble and he gave us a ride home, to which we arrived at 2 PM. Then we woke up at 9:30 to have a phenomenal household quiet time reading Acts 5-10 and learning about the epic adventures of the first century church. Persecution was peaking and growth in the church was at its apex because of the fiery faith and bold lifestyle of the disciples. It makes me want to go crazy and get radical for the kingdom of God. Then we prayed for 30 minutes and then had a great D-Time with Jeremy Melcher-Post, one of the coolest guys in the campus ministry. He is so wise and knows his bible and how to help people in need and challenge properly. He was an integral part in Josh's baptism and I really appreciate him a lot even though I rarely express it. Next I got to chill with THE one and only Russel Kirkpatrick. He made me lunch and inspired me with his current miracles and faithful expeditions. After so much encouragement from God and my brothers, I was just absolutely pumped to be a Christian and serving God. I got to chill with my little brother briefly playing zombies and then I jumped in the car to see my WONDERFUL girlfriend. At the time I was still a little prideful and bitter about our miscommunications for the week but I had an amazing time praying to the Lord in the car for an hour on my way up. There were so many things I prayed for but I'm just extremely grateful for that time I got to do it. I love my Lord so much and I'm grateful for the amazing ways he has answered so many prayers throughout my life. Upon arrival to my girly's house, I knocked on the door and she opened it and looked like an angel. She literally looked perfect to me. There she was in a beautiful dress with lots of little flowers on it and her hair looked amazing and her nails were beautiful and her eyes and face and EVERYTHING was just perfect. Nirvana was home so I got to go in and chat with them and tell them about my amazing day and also listen to them a little bit. Lisa was sick in the morning but she miraculously got better after throwing up and taking medicine. Then we hopped in the car and drove to the dating devotional :). THe best part was LISA apologized to me, I didn't bring the issues i was struggling up at all but she apologized to me because she got really prideful when I told her she should get advice on studying the bible with her sisters...and so she's just super humble and I told her and kinda apologized for being critical of her tardiness and miscommunications as far as that whole area goes and I just really really appreciate her openness and humility because she IS amazing and its like "wherever there is a miscommunication, Satan fills in the blanks" so basically we both suck at communicating and need to OVERcommunicate. We arrived at the Shepard's house (Allan the chiropractor and his wife ___) and it was far beyond my expectations. They cooked for us, we played games, had some amazing fellowship, and then a wonderful lesson on dating! The point was honoring God with our relationship through our PURITY and COMMUNICATION. It was as if he was speaking straight to us and wow was it inspiring. I thought about things being permissible versus beneficial...i thought about how I need to brag more about our relationship and how we've been pure and unphysical for the entire time and will continue to do so until marriage (if that's God's plan :) Anyways, it was a great time and I really admire everything about the OC church, especially the group of people that were at this devotional. I need to be more humble still and ask questions and get contact information from ALL the brothers up there to set up dates and stuff...but amen for the internet cus I can still do that.
So father God I love you like crazy, I know this stuff is all due to YOU and how YOU work in my life and the ways YOU inspire me and save me and forgive me and help me to love. Please give me the strength to love you and my brothers/sisters/enemies, no matter how hard it gets. I love you like crazy, please be with church this morning and the fellowship and everything Going on in the campus ministry in SD and around the world. I need you desperately and I'm grateful for all you've done for me. Thanks Lord, Your amazing. AMEN!

Shawn Wooten

Isaiah 62:5
send friends groomsmen to talk to her dad, and hopefully convince dad that im a good guy. if the dad agrees than my dad goes and talks to him to make financial agreement since im taking a worker from his home...if aggreement then theres a big party. at some point during party i stand up and say "i am going to my fathers house to prepare a place for us" and when i finish i will come back to get you...then id take up my cup wuthg wine and drink from it and thenask her if she's willing to drink from it. and if she takes it and drinks from it then we are married the i do moment. then i ha e to go build a house as fast as i can...she goes home puts lamp in window and its a sign that she's taken ...my groom have to watchover the purity of the bride making sure she's pure and committed to me until i get her!

THe Groomsmen Make Invitation (not groom himself)
God didn't invite you here, some friends of Jesus invited you here
John 15:14-16


2 cor 5:18-20

ppl get their first impression of GOd through US! we're ppls first chance to consider entering into a marriage w/God

WE offer mariage to God to the world

WHY ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT YOURSELF...they aren't rejecting YOU, they reject GOD

IF there's a God then its more important than your OPINION...

We're the groomsmen! Stop someone and give them a chance!

If you could read a book that would stop the AIDS virus would you do it?
If you could read a book that would cure cancer would yuou do it??
If you could read a book and change the eternal destiny of MILLION, would you do it?

2. What was Paid for the Bride?
Hebrews 10:11-12
SITTING means its all done! You don't come here to get your sins forgiven, you come because your fired up your sins are forgiven!
v. 19-20

3. Faithfully Waiting for the Groom
John 14:1-3
God's "will you marry me?"
biggest promise I will always be with you!

we have to stay pure! thank GOd for FRIENDS...love each other enough to go back and pull each other...EVEN if they ask you not to

4. WIll you Drink from the Cup
Mark 14:23
JEsus offers his cup to you...that would seal your marriage!
EVERY week remember its Jesus offering you marriage every week! you must be willing to wait, be pure, etc. if you got engaged yesterday or a month ago your FIRED UP! if you got engaged 20 years ago, you might be thinking...

Revelation 19:7
Revelation 22:4
Moses knew the best possible thing to wish for: seeing God's face. But God knew that such a thing would destroy Moses. New body is a body that can withstand seeing God's face! Moses LIGHTS UP by just seeing the ground which God passed over! IMAGINE HIS FACE

Dream Big

This week:
RADICALLY
FAITHFULLY
GOD WILL USE ME to:

-Reach out to at least 60 people before our first bible talk this Wednesday (1 per minute) in addition to texting every Aztec on my list.
-Set up a bible study with David Chang, chill time AND study with Gordie Nash, and a good time just to CHILL and get deep with Alex W and Kevin T.
-Pray to God for 30 minutes straight.
-Learning about Dating with Lisa and apply everything we learn to invigorate our relationship the way GOD wants me to.
-Have at least one deeper talk with a co-worker...
-Search for a house with all my heart.

Quotes

Love, generally, is that principle that leads one moral being to desire and delight in another, and reaches its highest form in that personal fellowship in which each person lives in the life of the other, and in receiving back the outflow of that others affection unto himself (James Orr, knowing God 123)

Happiness is only real when shared.
(Into the Wild)

Wisdom is the power to see and the inclination to choose, the best and highest goal, togethor with the surest means of attaining it.
(Knowing God)

Until man duplicates a blade of grass, nature can laugh at his so called "scientific knowledge"
(Thomas Edison in cueball christianity by Jeff Arias)

Stand on what is true (scripture) and do not let go. Period.
(Wild at Heart 166)

"My hands can bend a bow of bronze"
Psalm 18:34

"Where there's no communication, Satan fills in the gaps."
(Wild at Heart)

"The World" is not a place or a set of behaviors--it is a system built by our collective sin, all our false selves coming together to reward and destroy each other.
(Wild at Heart 151)

"To experience the strength of a man is to have him speak on our behalf...'how are you?' is one of the most loving questions John asks me"
(Wild at Heart)

"As cars were created to be fueled by gasoline, we were created to be fueled by God"

The deeper you get in the water (the deeper into a man's heart) the more dangerous it gets...but the better it gets...draw your heart out, dig deep, get vulnerable! stop being shallow on the outside in ankle deep water! it may be safer, but it don't matter nearly as much
Prov. 20:5 Lisa's interpretation

psalm 101:3

1 Peter 4-5


jesus never doubted his vision was unclouded
103 Jesus the Same

we measure men too much by their capacities, by what they are today and not by what they may become later on
105 jesus the same